On today’s edition of ‘The Martha Stewart Show’, the hilarious Joan Rivers joined Martha in the kitchen to help viewers get ready for Passover dinner. The pair turned traditional matzo, a Passover staple, into a sweet treat by coating it with chocolate, nuts and dried fruit. Joan joked, “Three holidays that you’re supposed to have fun on as a Jew – one is Chanukah; one is Passover; and one is the SAKS sale.”
Joan Rivers on matzo and aging:
JR: Can I just say – every time I see matzo it reminds me of my chest. Flat and brown spots.
MS: Joan! I don’t know when women start to make fun of themselves…I wouldn’t talk about that stuff EVER!
JR: But your body’s in better shape. You were a model, bitch.
Joan Rivers on her upcoming trip to China:
MS: Why are you going to China?
JR: Again, a mistake. Olivia Newton-John called me and she said, ‘This is for breast cancer, would you like to walk the great wall?’…I thought she said ‘Walk the great mall,’ and I said, ‘You got it!’
MS: Did you learn any Chinese?
JR: Yes, I learned one phrase – ‘I am single. Are you?’ I also think it’s important to learn, ‘Where is Gucci?’
Joan Rivers on her love for sweets:
MS: You like sweets?
JR: Look at my ass.
Joan Rivers on the chocolate matzo:
JR: Moses would have loved this!
Joan Rivers on her matzo house:
MS: Are they [the audience] laughing at your gingerbread roof?
JR: Yes! They’re laughing and I’m not even naked!
MS: I’ve made one side of my little roof, and it’s very neat and perfect.
JR: And I’ve done mine free form. I think of myself as a modern artist.
credit: Anders Krusberg/The Martha Stewart Show
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